[日記] Out of The Box With Unique #1 [6/3/2005]
Out of the Box With Unique June 3
Guess who's bizack? (If you think this is a
misprint please check your local cable listings
for MTV or BET). It's ya girl, Unique. I hope
all of you had a good and progressive week.
Wow! I have so much to share I don't know
where to begin. I've been pondering what
direction I wanted to take this journal.
Since we have been on a four-game road trip
I've had a lot of time to write. If not in
the airport, it has been on the plane. If
not on the plane, it’s been on the bus. If
not on the bus, it’s been in my room…Alright,
you get the point. I've been keeping a journal
for a while now. It's my way of venting and
putting my feelings and emotions on paper. It
really helps me relax and gives me inner peace.
I love looking back to see how my ‘being’ evolves
over time. How things can make me cry at one point
and then make me laugh at another. Well, that’s
enough background -- let’s dive in.
Since my last entry, things have been moving fast.
Can you believe it? We are already four games into
the season. As I reflect back on this last week, I
realize my emotions were all over the place. I went
from nervous (because May 21st marked my return to
the game with a new team). Then, I was excited because
I got my first win as a Spark. I was disappointed
after our losses to Minnesota and Charlotte because
we did not play up to our abilities. As we approached
the game in D.C (Mystics), I was angry because I was
fed up with everyone asking me the same questions in
regards to my personal issue. Luckily Nikki T. (# 42)
said something that really hit home. She said "I know
you get tired of people asking you the same questions
over and over. We are all human and we all go through
trials and tribulations and then we get the strength
to get through it and we move on.” Key words are
MOVE ON. I sure have MOVED ON and now I guess I'm the
leader waiting for others to follow! After the game in
D.C., I felt relieved mainly because the anticipation
of my return to D.C was over. We started the season
with four games on the road and have gone 2-2. I can't
wait to play on our own turf. I'm sure STAPLES Center
will be rocking with all of our Sparks fans. We know
what we have to do in order for us to play well and
each game we have progressed towards that goal. Go Sparks!
I was relaxing in my hotel room in Charlotte, N.C. the
night before our game against the Sting. Now I'm
chilling, listening to my new Common album. Be just
relaxing ‘cause a sister was tired from those back
2 back games. All of a sudden something hit my mind
like a hammer. I had to quickly jump out of bed and
grab my weapon (my pen) and start attacking the pages.
I had thought of a T-shirt my boy (W.Ellington Felton)
had made for me a year ago and the message was: “IF
YOU LOOK OUTSIDE THE BOX THERE IS SO MUCH MORE GOING ON.”
I started reflecting on society and how we allow
people to put us in a box. It's like people are
listening to an alien voice over a loud speaker
that I try to ignore. Over that speaker they are
blasting conform, conform don't be different, be
just like us. Man that's why we have so many
walking zombies and people who can't think for
themselves. It's crazy that as soon as we are
born, we are told how to walk, how to talk, what
we should be when we grow up, what is right, and
what is wrong. It’s like we are forced into this
way of life.
For example, when I was younger my grandmother
made me go to church -- our denomination was Lutheran.
I also went to a Lutheran school. One day I went
to church with my grandmother’s best friend, Mrs. Marie.
She went to a Baptist church. At a young age,
with the music and upbeat service, it had my
attention. The service at our church was a lot
calmer and we sang hymns. I needed something to
keep my attention, because if I fell asleep in
church, I would be punished and lose a privilege.
I was just trying to find a happy medium. When I
told my grandmother I didn't want to go to our
church anymore she got upset. I told her I wanted
to go with her best friend who lives right upstairs
and who would take me with her. She said as long as
you live in my house you will go to church with me
and we are Lutheran. I remember at a young age
battling this in my mind. Why won’t she let me go
to church with Mrs. Marie? I remember being sad and
upset with my grandmother. I felt like I had no
freedom when I was 11 and 12. Ever since that day,
I have struggled with being free in a world that
tries to lock us in. As I have grown older, I've
come to realize that living a life of meaning is
about feeling free. Who wants to walk around with
shackles on all day? I want to have the freedom to
decide how I want to handle and act in certain
situations. I think meditation has helped me relax
and learn how to be calm and still. I don't know
about you, but when I'm still, my focus is clearer.
Being still requires you to step outside the box --
outside of the situation so you can see things clearer
-- and you are seeing things clearer because you are
free. Yes, freedom outside of the world’s constraints.
Don't put me in a box because I will not fit!
Thanks for coming through once again!! As always the
love is appreciated. I hope all of you have a great
week. Remember to spread that positive energy. Peace
and Blessings. - Unique #1
Thought for the Week:
"The tragedy of life doesn't lie in not reaching your goal.
The tragedy of life lies in having no goal to reach.
It isn't a calamity to die with dreams unfulfilled, but
it is a calamity not to dream.
It is not a disgrace not to reach the stars, but it is a
disgrace to have no stars to reach for.
Not for failure, but low aim is a sin."
- Benjamin Elijah
http://www.wnba.com/sparks/news/outofbox_050603.html
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